Just like the one I did for 2018 this piece is about how my year was.
There’s something funny about recalling the year and really trying to make sense of everything that occurred. Last year it was easy but as I write my review for 2019 I’m struggling a little bit and I don’t know if that’s a good thing or a bad thing. Some of the things that happened seem like they happened much longer ago, it’s weird thinking that it all happened a few months ago, but this year was a sprint. Above all, I am thankful and appreciative for everything that I accomplished throughout 2019.
At the start of the year I set myself a list of goals. I wrote about them and publicized them as a way of holding myself accountable. The link to the post where I discussed them will be at the bottom. The list was moderate and served as an outline for the year. I like to take it easy and my goals reflected that. I met all of my goals except one, I didn’t pass all my classes with Bs or higher, and that’s okay I’m still proud of the way they turned out. Of course, I want to do better and I will. I think that this year I’ll aim higher and even if I don’t meet the goals I set, I will not be disappointed as I was pretty conservative with what I set out for myself before. I almost never set goals at the start of the year because I’m under the impression that if you want to change something or do something different, you don’t have to wait until the new year to do so. You can always start now. Setting goals gives you something to shoot for, so I’ll keep it up.
Looking back at 2019, it was a good year. I met new people, I did well in school, I did more of what I wanted to do, and I think the best thing out of everything was that I strengthened my relationships and created some new ones. Of course I had my bad days, but I kept them to a minimum this year. I strived to express gratitude in everything I did day in and day out. In 2019 I learned to be more appreciative and enjoy the small things. We are all given a minuscule amount of time and space here on Earth compared to what the universe holds, and if there’s one thing you can do to be a little bit better, it’s to recognize that, and be thankful.
The first couple months of 2019 were not that exciting. School was the main event and the blip of color I saw throughout it came from the little crush I had on the girl I sat next to in one of my classes. I was lucky enough to hangout with her a couple times and get to know her a little better. She’s the cutie from the 408. The spring semester, academically, was pretty easy. I didn’t struggle as much as I did during the fall. I’m starting to see a pattern where the fall semester is always more difficult than the spring. There is more work and the grind is unforgiving. Nonetheless, I’ve managed so far and I am ready to keep the grind going.
One of my favorite things I did in the spring was going to the PHX Art Museum and experiencing “The Visitors” by Ragnar Kjartansson. A visual and musical tapestry, nine different parts, and a collection of musicians, with each piece stitched together to form a single masterpiece. I’ve written about it before, but it was remarkable and I was able to share it my school crush.
Summer was slow, as it always is. Summer school made it a little more bearable, surprisingly. I had a good routine, class in the morning, coffee and breakfast right after, then work. I liked it. It went well, homework and trying to stay in touch my crush kept me busy. It was a good summer, nothing extraordinary, but I like to keep it low key, and that’s okay. I became a regular at Bosa which isn’t the healthiest thing, but I like it, and it’s cheap, it’s the spot. I also got tickets to see Daniel Caeser, another one of my favorite things I did this year.
That happened towards the start of the fall semester and late August. It was my first concert and I got to experience it with my school crush. I still can’t believe that this thing transformed from us sitting next to each other in class and not really talking, to us holding each other close as DanieI Caeser wrote the soundtrack for the memories. I have that night in high regard. I could write about it for days, but I won’t. It was cute and I hadn’t had anything like that in a while. I was the luckiest person in the room. It is one of the best things I did in 2019. I will not forget it.
The fall came and quickly went. It was a marathon. Fall semester for some reason always seems impossible to me, it’s my Everest. I always make the summit though, I trip and stumble, and sometimes take two steps back for every step forward, but I learn, and learn, and continue forward. I never stop learning and neither should you.
Christmas and Thanksgiving came and went. I’m thankful for that. The holidays are always a bustle of family visiting and get togethers. As tiring as it gets, I appreciate it every time and value the time spent with the people I love.
During the second half of 2019, I don’t know what happened, but there were some relationships of mine that died down and went on standby. They’re missed, for sure, but I can not stay there and chip away at them over and over again, trying to reach something that’s not there. It’s sad, great friendships that become phantoms. But where something is lost, something new takes its place. I can only continue my path of doing my part and enjoying what I’ve been given.
In 2019 I learned a lot. I learned to be more grateful and really value everything and everyone. Nothing is forever; and as quickly as something came to be, it can also disappear. I learned to act more in accordance to the world instead of just for myself. People were made for each other , I was made for you, and you were made for me. To serve each other, to help each other. We were put at the top to have everything below us serve. I stopped worrying about what so and so is doing and more about what I can do to help myself and those around me. If everything I do is for the benefit of myself and for those around me then I am acting in the way I am supposed to.
I have learned to be more patient and sit things out and wait. What has happened before will come again, life is a routine and an amalgam of cycles. If it’s happening now, it has happened before, and will happen again. If something troubles me, it is because of the judgement I’ve made surrounding it, and it must be removed. I have learned that kindness defeats even the nastiest people and if anyone benefits from my kindness or me just being me, then I am also benefited. You, by reading this are also benefited. Take what I’ve done and implement it to your daily routine. If you want to see change you have to be the change. You can’t expect something different without change, it’s like expecting an apple tree to give oranges. If you fear change, the you must make a transformation. Life is a forever ongoing process, change is as close as you can be to nature. Just think, could you and I be kept full if the food we ate didn’t change?
There’s a lot I learned this past year, and I will continue that trend this year. I became a better me. This year I hope to accomplish more and get better every single day. If I am able to get better everyday that’s consistent growth and I will be someone new 11 months from now. I can only expect the best for myself and peers and continue doing what is right. I hope you’ve all had a good 2019 and have an even better 2020. I love you all. If you read this all the way through, I love you a little bit more, thank you, and happy new year!