feels like summer

PREFACE: 

I almost tucked this one away and decided not to share it. I originally wanted to switch up this whole thing and dedicate the blog to something else but maybe later, I like how it is for now. I also needed to express at least a little bit of how I’m feeling and what it’s been like for me recently. I have good expectations for the rest of the year and I hope that I have some more pieces like this to share before the 2019 ends. So here we go. 

Now that summer is coming to a gracious end, I feel like it’s time for me to get back on here and write for a little bit. I’ve been writing a lot but most of it has been for my eyes only, words that I hope no one in a thousand years gets to see. But this, this is for you.

Summer school ended for me on a high note, I passed, thankfully. With summer school ending my routine got cut by a lot and I was pretty much working all the time, no breaks. July was a year long and uneventful. Some of the highs came from the nightly texts I’d get from the 408, they were lightning bolts that struck every time my phone rang with one of them, I could not get enough, I still can’t. During July I also bought two tickets to see Daniel Caeser, easily one of my top ten favorite artists if I sat down and made a list. But I’ll get to the concert in a little bit. For now, what July needed was a skippable cutscene to get to the good stuff in August.

August was BIG. On the third day, one of my best friends, brother even, got married. I could not be more happy for him. It’s beautiful to see what love looks like and how it molds and transforms with time and experience. It was their night, surrounded in support by their friends and family, they made unbreakable promises to each other with us as witnesses. The weight of their words could be felt during the ceremony. Each declaration tied them together, pulling them closer and closer, as husband and wife. The wedding passed and it was getting closer and closer to the first day of school. But before that I had to send out my invite to the concert. She was ecstatic, I felt her smile 700 miles away. I was bombarded with hearts and thanks, what more could someone ask for? Two weeks to go and I’d be blessed with seeing her. The day came. It was a warm Sunday night before the first day of school, I was NERVOUS. I greeted her with glee and roses that flickered like fire in the sun. Ramen was for dinner, we ate, we talked, caught up, smiled, I was happy to see her, to be with her. The concert was less than a week away and she was it. The first week of classes was nothing special. Picking a good seat is always important and I prefer to not sit too far from the front but not too far back either. The semester looks tough but manageable. Almost like a reward for getting through the first week, Daniel Caeser came on Friday night.

I had been looking forward to it for so long and the day had finally arrived. I had my fit picked out a week before but she told me hers was going to be a last minute thing, so when she came out in the leopard print, matching with me, I had cupids circling my head. It was a perfect, beautiful surprise for me and I couldn’t be more thankful. The venue was cute, it wasn’t big inside, cozy even, and the low lights with the murals on the walls set the mood for the night. It was a tight squeeze as you can imagine, but we were in line early so we got to be not too far from the stage. The show started. I forget the name of the girl that opened for Daniel and I feel bad about it because she was great and groovy and that got me and her moving. The opening act was a sweet introduction to an unforgettable night.  Her set ended and it was a short wait for Daniel to begin. He erupted with temblor, I was captivated, lost in a trance by the surrealness of the whole thing, I couldn't get enough. He opened with CYANIDE, a song that I was mighty familiar with and she was too. With each song I became enchanted by the power of the night. Several times I closed my eyes and took it all in, the sights, the sounds, the feeling of her brushing up on me, I was real and so was she, every jostle and embrace from her reminded me of where I was. She kept me planted. Her hands fit into mine like a puzzle piece and each time she held on I wished she wouldn't let go. Daniel Caeser, with the music he made, cured us of our afflictions, of our worries and in that moment we were unstoppable, a runaway train with miles of track heading nowhere. Our hands were raised towards him and our voices echoed his, he was king. But even then, I had royalty beside me, a queen whose eyes radiated with glamour and child like joy each time they locked with mine. He played Get You and Blessed, two songs that resounded with what I felt in that moment. I was happy. With each word he sang, I saw her smile, I saw her deep brown eyes, I heard her laugh, I heard her voice. Daniel Caeser closed the night with a big thank you but it was me who was thankful. He was the author of the night and I was lucky enough to have had a good part in his story. I only wished it didn’t have to end. I drove home with a smile and a twinkle in my eyes that night, I loved it.

All this goes to say that I’ve been doing good recently. I am happy. Most importantly I am thankful, I am thankful for the opportunity of having had such a great night, I am thankful for my friends and family, I am thankful for her, I am thankful for all the good that I’ve experienced throughout the second half of the year and I hope that it stays this way. As for you, I hope that your semester, your job, whatever you are doing, is going well, you got this. Thank you for reading and for allowing me to share this sliver of myself with you; until next time.

-jonathan

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